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Criminal Minds

Criminal Minds (2005-2020)

No Nudity

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Review

The CBS crime drama Criminal Minds follows the cases of coppers from the Behavioral Analysis Unit, an elite crew of FBI profilers who get inside the brains of the baddest baddies around. Originally starring Mandy Patinkin as the FBI's number one profiler, Jason Gideon, the show went on to feature Joe Mantegna in the lead as David Rossi, a profiler who quit the gig to write books but couldn't resist the call of actual crime solving. But it's the talents of Paget Brewster, A.J. Cook, Lola Glaudini, and Meredith Monroe that kept us coming back for more. It must not just be us, though, since this CBS mainstay lasted from 2005 to 2020, then got revived in 2022. Differing from most police procedurals, Criminal Minds focuses on the criminal rather than the crime, and also begins and ends with discussion of a quote from a famous writer or poet. Some of the standout episodes involve C. Thomas Howell's work as "The Reaper" a serial killer who ends up offing Aaron Hotchner's (Thomas Gibson) ex-wife (Meredith Monroe), Jason Alexander playing a murderer who turns himself in as part of an even more sinister plan, Michelle Trachtenberg playing a psychotic stalker, and Aubrey Plaza playing a weirdo international assassin. It's CBS so it's all the network TV no skin BS, but we do get some good stuff from some famous faces. Aubrey will have you sweating bullets seeing how perky her nips are in a tight sweater. Keep your eyes on those tatas or you might get your eye poked out! Amber Heard shows off her bikini body on a movie set, and her set look damn good while she's doing it! In a black bra and panties and Cowboy hat, Briana Brown will have you begging her to go for a ride, while it's Adrianne Palicki who'll really make you sticky seeing her big boobs bouncing in a leopard print bra. For over a decade our dirty minds haven't been able to stop thinking about the dangerously sexy women on Criminal Minds!